Sweet Sixteen

[ravenclawsquill]

Title: Sweet Sixteen
Author: ravenclawsquill
Prompt: Cake
Characters: Draco Malfoy, Narcissa Malfoy
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 100
Warnings: Angst, second person POV (yes, really!)
Summary: Birthday parties are not supposed to be like this.
Notes: Thanks to digthewriter for the beta!



Birthday parties are not supposed to be like this.

You shouldn't be flanked by your father’s friends, your stomach a tight knot of terror.

Earlier, there were presents: Dark artefacts, banned books, and a smart suit to remind you that you're a man, now.

Later you’ll receive another gift, jet black and irrevocable.

Your mother’s forced smile falters when the Elves bring out the cake. Three tiers, sixteen candles, and you know the sugar will turn to ash in your mouth.

You draw a gasp of stale air and blow, wishing above all else that you’ll live to see seventeen.

Comments

[felixfvlicis]

Okay . . . how do you manage to just, rip my heart out but give me something beautiful at the same time? I really want to know.

This:

Three tiers, sixteen candles, and you know the sugar will turn to ash in your mouth.

You captured the loss of Draco's innocence, his childhood absolutely perfectly in a single sentence. Brilliant.

God, you're talented. I wish I had one iota of it. I just . . . yeah. Whoa.

♥

[ravenclawsquill]

Thank you, you're too kind!

Poor Draco, I'm really putting him through hell with my recent drabbles ... I blame the 100 word format; it's perfect for angst!

[kerrilee75.livejournal.com]

God that was gorgeous and heartbreaking.

[ravenclawsquill]

Thank you so much!

[kikimay]

Ouch, so beautifully written and thought. Here comes the pain for Draco.

[ravenclawsquill]

Here comes the pain – Indeed! Poor Draco, eh?

And thank you, I'm glad you liked it!

[katie-flint.livejournal.com]

This was perfectly angsty! Ugh, my heart's tight now, poor Draco. Lovely job~

[ravenclawsquill]

Thank you!

[capitu]

Great job with this, my heart is aching for this kid all over again. <3 Powerful and incredibly emotional.

[ravenclawsquill]

Thanks, lovely! Poor little Draco, drowning in a sea of angst...

[digthewriter]

Three tiers, sixteen candles, and you know the sugar will turn to ash in your mouth.

I trembled at this. Just brilliant.

[ravenclawsquill]

Thanks, lovely!

[birdsofshore]

Oh Christ on a bike, this is beautiful and terrible. I'm fighting tears here, and also trying not to choke on my jealousy at your skills, LOLOL. Stunning. ♥

[ravenclawsquill]

Thank you so much!

I had two ideas for drabbles based on this prompt - the other being Draco somehow force-feeding Snape some cake - and this was the one I went with. Aren't I nasty?

[carpemermaid.livejournal.com]

Ugghhhh my heart!! How can you hurt us so much in just 100 words? God the line about the dark mark and the wish to live to see seventeen, so good! *cries*

[ravenclawsquill]

Thank you (and sorry)! Poor, vulnerable Draco ... I half want to write his 25th birthday and make it delightful, just as an apology to him!